Here is your Tarot reading for the week ahead….and would you know it, I went and forgot that it’s Valentine’s day right at the end of this week! Oh well, you get spared a bunch of boring relationship talk! For this reading I’m using the Crystal Visions Tarot….
Hope you have a lovely Valentines Day and please feel free to add your own take on these cards in the comments below
Psssst! I’m doing a free webinar on Thursday night, click on the image below for more info and to register
Veronica Noir is The Daily Tarot Girl’s fearless, daring (yet evil!) twin. When she isn’t offering up salacious advice on a Friday, she’s cruising around the Mediterranean on her yacht with a couple of boy-toys, a good book and a cool mojito.
Archangel Oracle Cards
by Doreen Virtue
Today or this weekend a close friend will ask you for advice. You will be tempted to unleash your mental cornucopia of brilliant insights.
If you do, this is what will happen:
Your friend will nod along like she’s listening. But then she will do the exact opposite of what you said. Almost as if she asked for your opinion only to reject it in a coy maneuver of subtle oneupmanship. The nerve!
So do this instead:
Give the exact opposite of what you think is “good advice” – your friend isn’t listening anyway, so have fun with it.
If she whines about her marriage, tell her to have an affair with the pool-boy. If she moans about how tired she is, suggest she mix a little Speed into her morning coffee. All work-related issues can be solved by taking an extended sick leave or quitting. All neighborly disputes can be fixed with….fists.”Maybe violence IS the answer”, you tell her.
You may soon find that none of your friends ever ask you for advice anymore. But would that really be such a bad thing?
Veronica is my evil twin and I let her scrawl her silliness all over my blog every Friday. Her readings are deep, insightful and full of penis innuendos. Let’s see what nonsense advice she has for you today…
Morgan Greer Tarot
Just like a spectator at an orgy, the fancy lady of the Nine of Pentacles reclines with ease and luxuriously nibbles on grapes!
Do you wish you could be this fancy lady?
Guess what? You can!
All you need is a falcon, some head jewels and the understanding that everything feels more decadent when you just sit back, relax and eat grapes.
If the kids are fighting this weekend, don’t intervene. Sit back, relax and eat some grapes. Pretend your watching gladiators in a Roman coliseum.
Friends boring you with tiresome, detailed stories about their latest vacation? Sit back, relax and eat grapes. Indulge in a lurid sex fantasy about Daniel Craig. Your friends won’t even know!
Can’t stand the thought of cooking dinner for your in-laws on Sunday night? Fuck it. Sit back, relax and eat grapes. Order pizza.
Veronica is my nefarious Tarot reading twin sister and she’s here to dish up some mystical advice like never before!
Anna K Tarot
It’s time to get dirty!!!! No, not like in that desperate/gross Christina Aguilera video….even better.
The Seven of Pentacles is about patience, but it’s also about actually involving yourself in something. Like when you start a craft project and before you know it it’s 3am and your covered in glue gun goo and sparkles!
Impatience is time-related and it’s a symptom of not being in the NOW. The easiest way to nix impatience in the bud is to throw yourself into a project – roll around in it, breathe it, smear it on your face and stuff.
Since you live in a culture that tries to distract you every five seconds with total bullshit, being focused and deep in create mode is one of the most subversive, bad ass things you can do!
And if you don’t have a project to throw yourself into, just throw yourself into life! Walk barefoot on the linoleum, toss your hand sanitizer, throw caution to the wind! Be willing to get a little messy – everything’s way more fun that way 😉
Veronica is my evil twin and fellow Tarot reader. How evil is she? Well, she detests baby showers and thinks wearing panties is for wimps. And when she isn’t strutting about in slutty halloween costumes all year round, she can be found in her local metaphysical bookstore….reading books but never buying anything. Here is her take on the Three of Cups…
Hezicos Tarot by Mary Griffin
Today’s Tarot card is the Three of Cups (from the Hezicos Tarot), which predicts that it won’t be long until you find your tribe of fellow wack-jobs!
For too long now you have felt like an outsider in your community – the crazy one, the one with odd hobbies and interests.
Not everyone is into meditating with crystals, energy healing and Shamanic journeying. In fact, hardly anyone is. Which has made you wonder….is it me? Am I the odd one?
Yes, you are! But guess what? That’s a good thing. All those normal people are crap…and they’re boring!
It’s high time you celebrated your unique nutsyness by starting a community of sorts. Put the call out – start a dream group, a healing circle or a Tarot study group – you will be shocked silly at the response you get!
Here’s a secret I found out recently….not everyone who seems “normal” actually is. Most of them are just pretending…just waiting for someone to come along and start an Astral Travel support group or something, so they can find their tribe.
So don’t be a lolagagging Lola….get out there and start recruiting some fringey friends!
Veronica is back! After her exhausting holiday of eggnog slamming and rum ball munching she’s back at it. This reading is a little less provocative that her usual stuff and she apologizes. She wore out her sarcastic, bitchy, judgy side over the holidays 😉
Dame Darcy Mermaid Tarot
Just because you’ve put time and effort into something doesn’t mean you have to stick with it. You can jump ship at any time!
The Three of Wands is all about looking over the manifestations of your efforts and deciding whether you should keep on keepin’ on or abort the whole plan.
Maybe you’ve worked very hard to get where you are in your job – long hours, boring schooling, being stressed out all the time – but if you look on the horizon and see only more stress, boredom and long hours, what’s the point?!
You can back out and change your mind at any time! Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
There seems to be this big taboo around quitting and giving up, but if your giving up something that sucks, that’s not weakness or failure….that’s wisdom!
Most people think January is a time for goal setting. Fuck that. January is a time for re-evaluating. Look at what past goals have brought you and decide if it’s working for the new you, or if it’s only appeasing the old you.
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